“Of all the languages in the world, the most difficult language to communicate is the language of feelings.”
One of the greatest challenges we face daily is the ability to communicate our feelings to another person. At any one time, we are dealing with eight aspects of communication. There is what we mean to say, what we actually do say, what the other person heard us say, and what they thought we meant. Then there is what they mean to say, what they actually do say, what we heard them say, and what we thought they meant. Is it any wonder that we don’t understand each other or that we have stress in our relationships? Often, we don’t even totally understand our own feelings, much less know how to communicate them to others. So we just push them aside. Many of us were mistakenly taught as children that our feelings are not important and in order to get along with other people, we must just “forget it,” “ignore it,”or “be quiet about it.” This may have brought us to the realization that other people’s feelings are more important than our own. So, to “keep the peace,” we denied our feelings. But denying them doesn’t make them go away. They may resurface in another way…dis-ease.
According to Prevention Magazine, “It is estimated that 90 percent of all physical problems have psychological roots. That might sound like a gross exaggeration. In fact, it’s probably a conservative estimate. A growing body of evidence indicates that virtually every ill that can befall the body — from acne to arthritis, headaches to heart disease, cold sores to cancer – is influenced, for better or worse, by our emotions.
Feelings govern our thought patterns and our behaviors. I remember my older sister often telling me that I needed to learn to control my feelings instead of allowing my feelings to control me. As a result, I learned to repress, suppress, and stuff my feelings. The feelings didn’t go away. They remained the source of many unresolved conflicts. If feelings are not resolved, their energy is stored inside you and continues to grow and expand. They can short circuit your system in many ways. If the feelings remain unresolved, this process continues to compound, and you could experience any number of disturbing effects. These feelings will manifest themselves, sometime, somewhere.
The wiser council would have been for me to “change my feelings.” When we change how we think about things, it changes our feelings, which then changes our behaviors and ultimately, our outcomes or results. If we are experiencing illness, unhappiness, or negativity, then we know we need to make some changes. If we will look at the Law of Cause and Effect, we will see that some cause is bringing about the effect we are experiencing. And we can change the cause.
Feelings are energy matter and possible to change. You can change feeling vibrations from negative to positive…permanently. My first challenge was to get in touch with my internal dialogue as my consciousness seemed to be fragmented. On the outside, I was saying the right things, but on the inside, I was feeling resentful. What we say –both aloud and to ourselves – affects our feelings. To replace negative with positive, it is necessary to identify and process the negative. Process, not dwell on. Remember most feelings are registered on a subconscious level, so when you get in touch with your feelings, you also are in touch with your subconscious
Did you ever wonder why affirmations work for some people, but not for others? It’s because for them to work, feeling and thinking must be aligned. If we are thinking one way, but feeling another, we are splitting our power. In order to effect a change, our thinking and feeling needs to be congruent. Thinking happens in the left hemisphere of the brain. Feeling happens in the right. When the two are aligned, we develop whole brain activity.
Remember, what’s going on inside of you didn’t happen overnight so it is unrealistic for the negativity to disappear overnight. It will take time and effort to accomplish your desired goals. You can do it. You are more than enough!
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