Are You Looking for Love?

When I was attending a function, the other evening, a group of women were sitting at a table talking. One of them turned, looked at me, and said, “Let’s ask Judi.” How did you find such a wonderful man as the one you have in your life?” The short answer: “Go on Match.com.” The real answer. You must be absolutely clear about your wants and needs. I wrote up a profile of what I was looking for…characteristics, behaviors, traits, values, interests, etc. I wanted someone who was on a similar path; someone who ate nutritionally, as I do; someone who believed the way I believe; someone who had a similar positive upbringing; someone who didn’t have many bad habits like smoking, or over indulging in alcohol; someone who likes to learn; and someone who enjoys life, has a good attitude, and would appreciate someone like me; someone who would be supportive and had no need to criticize or control. Some of my friends said that finding this person would be impossible. When I saw this man on the internet, his smile was electric, so I decided to hit the wink button even though he was thousands of miles away. When he responded, I spent time getting to know him…really, really listening to what he said about himself and others. When I met him in person, I thought he was extremely attractive, but it wasn’t until I spent time with him that I realized what a kind and gentle soul he was. We were so different — from different walks of life, but he had all the things that I had listed. So, my answer is: Be the person you want to attract. And when you attract that person into your life, respect who he is, respect what he does and what he believes, leave your old baggage behind and help him do the same.